Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize