You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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