Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
