Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize