I think i peed on brittanys purse
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize