Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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