I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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