I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
