And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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