a queef is a wish your heart makes.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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