get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Randomize
