I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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