Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize