alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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