i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Randomize
