when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize