Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
