I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
How's work?
Spinning.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize