He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
