My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
