i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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