Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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