Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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