Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
