is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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