I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
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