I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
