More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize