So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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