i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
