Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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