The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
