It's like God shit irony all over that family
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
