Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
