I must be too annoying 4 u.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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