He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
