its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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