He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
