Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize