You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize