Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize