there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
The uberlube is also flammable
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
