ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Randomize
