I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I'm at about main and main street
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
