You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
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