where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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