Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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