The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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