they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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