So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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