Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
it's like heaven, but drunker
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
