Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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