I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
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